Obsessive Comparison Disorder

 

One of the least known or discussed about afflictions in humans is the Constant Comparison Disorder, not to be confused with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

The Constant Comparison Disorder is in fact a disorder generally characterized by an obsession with comparing yourself to others.

It is considered a disorder only limited to individuals, but I feel as a society, the whole world suffers from this obsessive comparison disorder.

The whole society is obsessed with the disorder and so we are fascinated by the classification of the worlds to 20 rich people, worlds top ten richest nations, the worlds top 20 happiest nations and the worlds top 20 most powerful nations …. The list is endless.

I recently came across this world happiness report 2023 in which it is mentioned that Finland is the happiest nation in the world.

This report has been vociferously contested because India is ranked 126, ranked below several countries including Pakistan, Nepal and Sri Lanka that have been themselves not doing so well within their own boundaries which cannot be defined a happy scene for the citizens.

The UN ranking uses six factors to measure the scale of happiness viz. Social Support, Income, Health, Freedom, Generosity, and Absence of corruption.

In an article in the Guardian, a British journalist has written that the main source of happiness in Finland is the presence of Saunas!

Practically every house has at least one sauna; that every citizen of Finland spends some time every day outdoors – be it to walk for a cup of coffee in neighbourhood store; that the greenery and scenic beauty also contributes to the happiness!

I don’t believe in the standards for measurement of happiness used in the survey because these standards are applicable from the developed nations perspective.

By those standards, only the rich people must be the happiest in the world because all the six factors are positive for rich people.

Yet there are so many rich suffering from depression, committing suicide and on the other hand I know several poor people within my own circle of social life and community who are amongst the happiest with whatever little wordly possessions they possess.

The maid who works in our house has a drunkard for a husband (no social support), has very little income, all skin and bones (not healthy), bound by work (no freedom), generosity limited to good deeds having very little cash and is surrounded by a corrupt system (in fact the corruption thrives in the zopadpatti of Zuarinagar with every service that should be free comes at a premium!).

Yet you wouldn’t find a more cheerful and happy person. She walks in every morning with a smile on her face and works like a horse without losing any of her cheer and when she leaves for home in the evening, the happy look on her face has not waned.

How then, do you define happiness?

Happiness cannot be measured, in my opinion, because it is a very personal outlook on life.

I may be the happiest person on earth, but there will be days when I am not happy because of some factor affecting my life.

In fact, why measure and compare ourselves with others at all?

Why do we want to know the top 20 richest countries, the top 20 happiest nations… why do we need to compare at all?

Let happiness be a personal and private emotion.

Same is the case with being rich; effectively of your income is more than your expenditure, you are rich and everyone can be rich by just controlling our needs and limiting our expenses within our income.

Again, this I feel, is a very personal affair and we don’t need to compare ourselves with others of how rich we are.

And so on.

Let us get out of this comparison syndrome and ignore all these studies of the top 10 stuff.

Let us compare ourself with what we were in the past; are we happier? Are we generous? Are we helpful to others? Are we giving something to our community in the form of service for the betterment?

Let us not be affected by trying to be the best.

Let us get rid of the comparison disorder.